Wonky stomach this morning, unhappy early a.m. hours...and of course in the middle of all the fun at work. Though there was no way I could go in to work with this, the weight of the stuff that is piling up for me [my Blackberry has been going nuts all morning] is causing some anxiety.
To repeat: urgh.
There exists a formal dress that I actually like, that is flattering for my 'born in the wrong era' figure, that wasn't *too* horribly expensive [though that is a relative term...let's just say it rounds up to $200]. And believe it or not, it was the second dress I tried on...and the first dress was also a 'wow, who knew?' [though this one was even more so]. Found shoes that fit and went well with the dress, found jewelry that should go nicely, got a wrap to keep my shoulders warm. All in all, a quite productive and not-as-exhausting-as-I'd-expected day...thanks in very, very large part to my shopping partner [shout-out to Susy!].
The only drawback is that the back laces up...which makes it a bit difficult to get into on my own. Susy has sweetly volunteered to be my 'lady-in-waiting' if needed, and I might have to take her up on that...or else draft Brian to do the final tweaks to my wardrobe that night. :^)
Thanks again, Susy...it was a blast.
Still another couple of hours at work to go, but at least we are heading into the weekend. With luck, I won't be working it...instead, I'll be shopping for formal togs: dress shopping with Susy on Saturday, then tux browsing with Brian Sunday. See, Facebook is having a formal "Black & White Ball" in May [what is being referred to as "the Facebook Prom"].
Yup. Yours truly, the cargo-pant-wearing, no frills, non-girly-girl is going to get all gussied up. Watch for a run on ice skates in Hades, mind the winged swines, and all that...it's an unusual occurrence to be sure.
One of those periods in life when it feels like the treadmill is set two clicks too high...you can keep up, but it's awkward and exhausting. Been working twelve- and thirteen-hour days, and it's getting to me. There is light at the end of the tunnel, but it's still at least three weeks away...so just doing what I can to keep chugging along. Thankfully I've got some good friends who understand that I've fallen off the radar for a bit, don't take it personally, and who are there for me when I do have time. That helps a lot.
Back to the grind...
...another year has passed since "that day in Toronto". I don't dwell on it, but it is undeniably burned into my brain. It was a major pivot point in my life, a time that started a cascade of events that still has aftershocks today. I may never quite wrap my brain around everything, why it happened, what I could have done differently, what effect it is having on me even now...so I spend a few moments to roll it around a bit, let the thoughts and feelings do their things, then release them into the universe and keep going.
It's all any of us can do, really.
An Amazon shipment came in today...in it was a DVD of "The Five Pennies" with Danny Kaye. One of my favorites...sweet, good love story, pain, triumph. I've always had a crush on Danny Kaye, and this is one of my favorites of his ["The Court Jester" is probably my absolute favorite]. How can you go wrong with a movie that includes duets with Danny Kaye and Louis Armstrong?
Exercising [step machine thingy for the legs plus resistance bands for the arms] whilst watching Doctor Who...not a bad way to spend some time. And the episode of Doctor Who was fun and fluffy, a good way to pass the time while working out, with one 'holyshitomgwtf' moment at the end. Evil writers...such teases.
Can't wait to see how this one plays out...
It's always hard to let go of a good time, especially when you've been able to escape for a while and leave the world behind. There's a bit of sadness and melancholy, and more than a little 'want to throw a tantrum and kick and scream and shout 'NOOOOO!! III DOOOOON'T WANNNNAAA!!' in protest', whilst holding on tooth and nail to every last little bit of peace and contentment, knowing that soon the daily routine starts again, your time is no longer your own, and you are once again at the mercy of the requirements and demands and needs and whims of others around you.
But as hard as it is to let go, at least you had those times...and there is a better than average chance of having more like them. Which in turn gives you a firmer handle on just what it is you go through that daily routine for: for moments just like those. Remember, you aren't living to work, you are working to live.
The distinction is important. And *that* is what you should hold on to with all your might...it's what makes it all worthwhile.
Showed my old passport and driver's license photos to a friend yesterday...the ones taken during a different life, when I was a different stacey. She looked at the pictures, looked at me, looked back again...and said "You know, you look younger now than you did then."
Considering that the photos were taken ten years ago [literally], I was taken aback. Talk about a flattering thing to say...wow.
