ah, now I understand

It's a frickin' marching band, warming up at the nearby school. Trumpet, drums, flute, and other unidentifiable instruments all warming up at full volume. Seriously.

Now let's see...if I were writing this thing, and our lead character was trying to sleep, what else would I throw in besides the gardeners and a marching band? Perhaps a circus parade, elephants trumpeting right past my place? Maybe have the next door neighbors win a rock concert in their backyard? Perhaps a water main break, so the city would have to jackhammer up the concrete right in front of my place?

[Uh, just kidding, Gods of Irony...really. Just a joke. No suggestions here, no sir...pay no attention to the bitter, sleep-deprived ramblings of a tired soul. No need to further exert your powers, really. Please?? Pretty please??]